Leaked: Uzo Aduba auditioned for every OITNB role

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Let Liz Lemon Be Your Valentine’s Day (next year)

This is very late but still very valid!

Valentine’s Day.

For some it’s the best, for others . . . the worst.

For me, it’s been the worst. The number of couples in the world seems to double, pink balloons emit an annoying glare, and bundles of roses just beg to be squashed.

But I’m trying to stay optimistic.

If you find yourself without any plans on Valentine’s Day, I can set you up with someone who is nice, funny, and is always down to eat a pot of stew.

And stay in and eat (night) cheese.

And eat all of the food always.

Reader, meet Liz Lemon from 30 Rock.

If you’re not familiar with Tina Fey’s alter-ego, she’s the best, even when carrying around bags of steamed broccoli and cackling like the joker (one of my favorites, season 6, episode 8).

I go to Netflix and hang out with Liz whenever I need to feel better – problems with work, problems with boys, problems with my digestive system because I’ve eaten too much French onion dip.

In every season of 30 Rock, Liz has stellar Valentine’s advice:

Season 1 Advice: Stay hopeful.

In the premiere season, Liz forgets about Valentine’s and works all night – but fate has other plans! She receives flowers from a secret someone and spends the whole episode trying to figure out from who. This episode reminds me that love often finds you when you’re not looking.

Season 2 Advice: If you don’t feel like celebrating, you don’t have to

30 Rock skips Valentine’s Day during their sophomore season, celebrating “Ludachristmas” and “Sandwich Day” instead. So don’t feel pressured to do anything Valentine’s Day-themed – it’s an opportunity, not an obligation.

So if you’re solo, no problem. If you’re with someone – maybe double-check they’re okay with skipping the festivities.

Season 3 Advice: Just Go With It

30rock-generalissimo

Liz unknowingly plans her first date with Dr. Baird (John Hamm) on Valentine’s Day and things escalate rather quickly (accidental nudity! meeting the family! sharing deathbed secrets!). The entire night goes against all of the “rules” of a first date, but they keep going, even after the door swings open on a toilet-squatting Liz.

Follow your heart, not your expectations!

Season 4 Advice: Friends Are Significant Others, Too

This time around, Liz doesn’t have a first date to stumble through. Instead, she courageously attempts to avoid Valentine’s Day by scheduling a root canal appointment – one puff of laughing gas and the 14th would just be a foggy, groggy memory!

Not so much.

It turns out you need someone to pick you up if you have any type of surgery, so she has to spend the rest of the day trying to wrangle someone to accompany her home. Liz is reminded that Valentine’s isn’t just about showing a boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse that you love them, but anyone in your life that you care about.

Season 5 Advice: Beware of bad dates

30 Rock

This episode isn’t explicitly Valentine’s Day-themed, but the characters indulge in romantic get-aways, with Liz and Carol (Matt Damon) boarding a flight to Nags Head, NC.

Liz believes that her shared stubbornness with Carol is a good thing, but Jack warns:

“Dating yourself is a double-edged sword, it means you also have the same flaws.”

So if you find yourself ending a relationship on or near Valentine’s Day, don’t worry – it’s usually for the best.

You don’t need this kind of tension in a relationship . . .

Season 6 Advice: Valentine’s Is What You Want It To Be

Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be a Hallmark-y moment where you exchange stuffed animals and feed each other chocolates. Maybe you and your significant other want to go play paintball or have a horror movie marathon or, like Liz and Criss, see if you can survive an excursion to IKEA. Whatever you end up doing, just do it with love.

So a happy (3 days after) Valentine’s day to us all!

Shannon + Netflix 4ever

[Feature image via, Liz cat via, Liz flowers via, Liz lovers via, John Hamm via, No one via, Liz Carol via, Waste you via, Liz don’t care via]